By Ade | November 27, 2007
Get your Recommended Daily Dose of Retard.Subscribe to Noisy, Noisy, Man via RSS or email and help save innocent puppies. Mr. Ade Magnaye,
It has come to my attention that in the seven months since you became single, your financial, emotional, sexual, and physical well-being has been in a state of constant decline. Yes, I know, you [...]
By Ade | November 7, 2007
‘Nak ng teteng naman itong buhay na to o!
Kamusta naman yon?
Ang hirap mag-aral, ang kulit ng kupal na Draco na yun, enlababo na ata sa akesh si Dobby, galit sa akesh si Snape, tapos eepal pa si Voldemort, nangangarap titigbakin ako–
Kamusta naman yon?
Nakakaloka!
By Ade | September 5, 2007
Hailing the cab
ME: I need to get to Ortigas. Fast.
DRIVER: Okay. We’ll take EDSA?
ME: Whichever way is faster is fine by me, but yes, EDSA sounds good.
DRIVER: Well then, EDSA it is. Brace yourself–
ME: HOLY FUCK DID YOU JUST GO FROM ZERO TO SIXTY IN FIVE SECONDS?!
DRIVER: Actually… zero to sixty-five. Big difference, you know.
ME: [...]
I just witnessed the weirdest thing in the world.
I was hanging out in Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf at Ortigas Park with Noelle; we were waiting for Adam Mordo and Marielle to arrive when this van stops in front of the park. The van’s doors suddenly burst open and out came these Korean kids. There [...]
Just so you know, I am such a big Harry Potter nerd; in fact, I once considered having somebody carve a lightning-shaped wound on my “magic wand” with a razor, so I’d get the characteristically-shaped scar when it heals. I still can’t understand why she wouldn’t agree to that.
Also, I actually stayed offline the night [...]
As a guy who’s been labeled as “safe” and having a “boy-next-door vibe“, I noticed that girls tend to trust me. A lot. I’m the guy who women hang out with and tell all their dirty linen to while he secretly masturbates to their stories when they’re not looking. It’s good to be trusted, which [...]
So I went to work today, and I realized I had left my pen at home. Well, normally, I wouldn’t mind since I have a ginormous penis which I lug around all the time and I use it to write stuff and sign contracts and ransom letters whenever needed, but it was the full moon [...]
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