Happy New Year everyone! 2007 has come and gone, and has assraped us all so awesomely.
Google Image Search result for “New Year”. Let the WTFs roll.
This year has like been the worst year of my life for reasons I can’t blog about lest this turns into a mushy emofest like LiveJournal. So instead I’ll distract you from badgering me about the details of my sucky year and present you with the obligatory best of 2007 post. I did this last year, and this is one of the few times where I actually do a meme of sorts, and for my new readers, this is a chance to sift through the best of my overly convoluted archives.
So now that I’ve got that lame intro out of the way, here’s the best of 2007. Read on:
- On Fitting Rooms – I know, this might probably suck because I wrote this like three days ago and I’m inclined to believe this is one of my best articles, even though I got a paltry comment count on that bitch. But still, this is the closest I got to getting laid in the longest time. Shut up.
- Taxi Ride – A recollection of the worst taxi ride in history.
- One Fine Day At Work – It took me a week to write this. Seriously. However, this comment (from Noelle) made the hard work all worth it: “This made me scratch my head. Maybe I should smoke some weed, THEN read the article.” Kinda sums up the rest of my blog.
- An Open Letter to Myself. From Myself. – This is me hitting rock bottom, getting drunk, and being found a day later singing a Village People song along Ortigas Avenue. And no, Donya Quixote, I do not have photographic evidence, sry.
- Rock Star Existentialism – This shows how deep and philosophical my bandmates are. Seriously. I mean, Porn, Meds and Rock n’ Roll? Those guys are like the new Beatles and nobody even notices us. Assholes.
- Buying Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows – Harry Potter 7 was the biggest book event ever for 2007. What kind of blogger am I if I didn’t do my share in posting the spoilers on the internet to make little kids and fanboys cry?
- BREAKING NEWS: The Man Blog Declares Coup D’état! OMG! – The Trillanes brouhaha at the Manila Pen was one of the biggest news stories of 2007. Just like any responsible blogger, I just had to make fun of it.
- The entire Know your Jologs series – This has been like the biggest thing on my blog ever. I had a handful of flamers (three), death threats (one), marriage proposals (from some dude named “Carlito”), and I’ve been chased by college girls (I keed not). And I’m still living in fear of the lawsuits. Oh wait, they can’t afford it.
- Troubleshooting Your Girl: Dieting – Women have a natural tendency to be thin. And no matter how much they stay in the kitchen, they can never grow fat, especially the hot ones. Yet they perpetually starve themselves to death because they think they’re fat. And in this article, I expose the truth about diets.
- Gay Best Friend. Only Straight. – This is me being emo and me being totally whiny about girls telling me the sordid details of their sex lives while I don’t get any. Well, thinking about it, because I know much about their sex lives I’m like having sex by proxy with five women on a regular basis. Awesome as it sounds, it actually does suck, mind you. You should try it sometime.
- An Open Letter to the Faggort Who Refused to Stop Rubbing My Bird on the MRT – Probably my second most controversial post for the year 2007, next to Know Your Jologs. You know why? I got hate from certain gays because I used the word “faggort”. Those fags. Also, there was this douche who insisted I was gay for not letting that fag feel me up. I know, WTF right?
- Rejected Filipino Dubs: Harry Potter – Yeah, I totally forgot this one. Thanks to Jeff, I was able to put this into the list, albeit belatedly. And this is another article teeming with faggotry. As if Harry Potter wasn’t faggoty enough, I just had to make him do swardspeak. So much for Noisy Noisy Man.
So yeah, that’s pretty much it. What about you guys? What are your favorite entries from your blog?