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The Hong Kong Chronicles

So I just spent six days in Hong Kong, and I honestly feel it was too short. C’mon, I needed more time to ogle at the awesomely hot Chinese and European women who were all over the place. Sadly though, it was as cold as hell when we got there, so everyone was covered. In layers.


My kung fu is better than your kung fu

Hills, Hills, and More Hills
This little factoid I found out when I decided that public transport is too expensive and that the weather’s good and I needed the exercise anyway, I should walk to the places within walking distance. Take, for instance, my aunt’s flat. I was told that it was a short ten-minute walk away from the hotel where I was staying. Nobody told me I had to go through like five hills, two parks, and an endless maze of steep stairways to get to her flat. Needless to say, I was a shivering pile of pain when I got to her place.

I took the cab back.

Language Barrier
So I tried very hard- very, very hard- to speak slowly and clearly to the non-english speaking natives so that we’d be able to communicate properly. But seriously, sometimes, I couldn’t get through to them. Case in point:


ME: I’d like to have some water please.
WAITRESS: Okay.

Five minutes pass. Waitress comes back. With a big sheepish grin.

ME: Where’s my water?
WAITRESS: Water closet?
ME: No, not water closet. Water! (Makes a drinking motion, hoping that sign language gets through)
WAITRESS: Oh!

Waitress comes back, holding a bottle in her hands. She unceremoniusly dumps the bottle on my hands.


ME: This is not water.
WAITRESS: But it is!
ME: This is ginger ale.
WAITRESS: Sorry, I speak no engrish, lah!
ME: … I kinda figured that out for myself.

So she grabbed another waiter, and he in turn grabbed another one. So the three of them came back and forth, giving me:

  • Wine
  • Soda water
  • Ginger ale. Again.
  • Sprite
  • Bubble Gum

When they finally figured out I wanted water, they gave me a bottle of Evian, which was fricking expensive but I was too tired to ask for another brand anymore. Also, it didn’t taste any different from your run-of-the-mill normal water.

MID-LEVELS = WIN
The hotel I was staying at is located at mid-levels, where all the expats live and where everything looked so posh and shiny. I seriously fell in love with the place, with its maze of interconnected walkways and old buildings side-by-side with the new. I walked around the area past midnight, without any fear of muggers and shit while taking pictures of everything. Also, to that Russian woman I followed for two streets, I’m so sorry. I promise to not follow you around while rubbing my crotch with one hand, camera in the other and generally looking like a sexual predator. Also, your dad carries a nice gun.

Anyway, I love Hong Kong. I really do. I wanna go back there and probably stalk some Russian girls again or something. Also, pictures are found in my Multiply.

Have you guys been on an out of the country trip lately? Tell me about it!

14 Comments

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  2. Pau

    No tittie pics? BOO!

    Pau's last blog post..Operation: Stop Being a Douche

  3. Hmmm…I never had problems talking with HK locals 2 years ago.

    Oh I forgot, I speak a little Mandarin. 😛

    But what's troubling me is that the HK police had no reports of you. What the hell did you do in HK, sleep and eat all those 6 days?! LOL

    jhay's last blog post..Problems with Globe 3G/GPRS & MMS

  4. Toe

    Hahaha! Bubble gum. 🙂 It's the same here… the communication gap is terrible. I've learned how to pantomine with the maid though. When she points to my husband's shorts and then gestures a big circle, it means that she burned his shorts again. When she gestures drinking, then opens her fist, it means that she broke another glass. 🙂

    Toe's last blog post..Bliss

  5. Just say Aqua if you want water. Same goes in Indonesia.

    Juice's last blog post..The Debut of the Short Hair

  6. Ade

    [quote comment="119989"]Im still tryna figure out where 'water closet' came from.

    [/quote]

    Wait till you get to the part where I get ginger ale.

    [quote comment="119988"]This proves that nobody in HK understands what "water" means. Last time I was there, I asked for water, they gave me a bowl of rice.

    [/quote]

    Okay. Your language barrier story wins over my language barrier story.

  7. Im still tryna figure out where 'water closet' came from.

    Helga's last blog post..A GEEKY DISAPPOINTMENT.

  8. This proves that nobody in HK understands what "water" means. Last time I was there, I asked for water, they gave me a bowl of rice.

    Baddie's last blog post..The Banana Gangbang Rock Festival: It’s a Festival… OF ROCK!

  9. Ann

    Everyone loves HK…but that Russian girl. :p

    Ann’s last blog post..Summer Break

  10. i love HK! we went there on a tour, and our guide kept referring to himself in the 3rd person:

    "I Henry closes eyes riding cable cars."

    he was so cute.

    cigarette-girl's last blog post..how to get lost in the cinema and other stories

  11. I LOVE HK!!! I spent my life savings shopping for random… shit. Also, their milk tea, which is one of my most favorite non-alcoholic drinks is so much tastier from the ones we have here. And the boys look like F4.

    FunnySexy's last blog post..My Double Simian Line

  12. Ade

    [quote comment="119974"]I've been on an out-of-country trip indefinitely for 6 months now=P

    [/quote]

    TNT KA NA MIDGET! =P

  13. I've been on an out-of-country trip indefinitely for 6 months now=P

    Next time, for water say "Shway"

    Also, practice this line "Wo te 'weiner' hen siao" (My weiner is very small)

    Sorsi's last blog post..The ?For Love? or ?For Lust? Face

  14. I love HK too 🙂 Except for the airport and crazy-filled-people-with-their-iPods in the MTRs every 6pm. I've been there twice or thrice and I'd love to again 😀

    Haha, I speak with lah too at the end of my sentences. It's something about hanging out with Chinese too much =P

    Juice's last blog post..My Inappropriate Mother

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