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How to Get a Date on Valentine's Day

Have you got your Valentine’s Day date yet?

For us who are happily in a relationship, there would be no problem. But for the (miserably) single, do you REALLY have to mope around on the 14th? No way. I wouldn’t let my dear readers (yes, both of you) be lonley and suicidal on the day of lovers.

This is you.
That’s the spirit, smile! You’ll get a date one of these days!

That bottle of sleeping pills looking good? Worry not, I’m here to lend you advice.

Have you got your prospect yet? Good. Here are my tips to win your special person’s heart:

  1. Be sweet. This is a no-brainer. You just have to be sweet to that special someone, and chances are he/she will say yes when you ask him/her out. Show that your prospect is important to you, and give him/her stuff that you wouldn’t usually give, like candies, flowers, cards, your left ear, a dog’s severed head, your spleen, etc. I’m sure your prospect will notice.
  2. Leave notes. Ok, this is a part of being sweet, but this has got to be in its own entry. Leave notes everywhere. Put one in his/her bag, post one on the windshield, put one on the desk. Heck, plaster the room with Post-Its. It would even be better if you post it outside for everyone to see. And make sure the notes contain something subtle like “I want to marry you and have kids with you. Now. If you don’t want to, I would grab you from behind and disembowel you in front of everyone.” Then sign it in your own blood. I’m sure he/she’d keep an eye out for you from now on.
  3. Be there. How can you be your prospect’s prospect if you’re not visible? So stop stalking him/her inside hiding that garbage can near his/her front door, show yourself! Be there for him/her, especially when he/she most needs it. And I’m not just talking about helping him/her out when he/she is sad, there’s more to that! Helpully hand his/her soap in the shower (surprise him/her, it works).When he/she is shopping for underwear, suggest the one that you most want to see him/her in. Roll your eyes and drool for good measure.
  4. Talk. Of course being a good conversationalist is always a plus. Nobody wants a boring date. So talk! Tell him/her anything under the sun! Be interesting, of course. Your stamp collection would only elict a yawn. Tell him/her about the time you won that nose picking contest. Or that collection of his/her nail clippings that you keep under your bed.
  5. Listen. Don’t just blabber, listen too! Keep your ears open, you might just pick up a clue or two about what your prospect wants! Maybe he/she wants you to loosen the ropes that you tied him/her to the chair with, or he/she wants to call the police already. Just don’t gag your prospect.You won’t be able to hear what he/she has to say.

That’s it! just follow these tips, and I assure you that you won’t fail to get a restraining order date for the big V-Day! Enjoy!

14 Comments

  1. nah… di ko pa na feel ang Valentines eversince 🙁

  2. nice tips! I think they might just work. I'm going to plan my scheme right away! lol.

  3. Hehe…I think I'm so insensitive sometimes that I can't even get past #1! I'm doomed! I think I'll spend the night watching depressing chick flicks with my dog.

  4. hello ade, opkors nanalalaa kita

    nalinked na kita:)

    ako lagi akong me kadate sa valentines, di nawawalan.. yabang no?! paano me asawa na ako! haha!joke!

    takecare and have a nice day

  5. Wala parin nag ask sakin. Wawa me. =/

    Btw, yeah it's a new and improved header, got a friend to 'pretty' it up for me. Nabo-boringan ako dun sa dati eh.

  6. unfortunately for me, my man just might be too busy with work that day 🙁

    then again, am looking forward to making him a towel wedding cake just for kicks 😀

  7. I believe women can ask guys out already

    whooo. you rock me!

  8. jey

    lol! nice tips ade!

    musta na?

  9. ade

    [Comment ID #18 Will Be Quoted Here]

    if you're looking for a <s>restraining order</s> date, it JUST might work.

    I believe women can ask guys out already.:)

  10. thanks for the tips. pwede ba pa, i have 8 days to go. 😎

  11. wow.. that's sweet of you. very encouraging too. maybe you could write a book? =D

  12. everyday is a valentin for us!

    yong mga single dyan dont be rush to find a valentine date , instead spend the day w/ your girlfriends or barkadas! screw valentines day! wahahaha!!!

  13. ade

    i'm just doing my part to help them singles! =P

  14. can you just talk about couples celebrating their first valentine's day? lol. im not even sure if my man and I will be going on the 14th. i actually would like to join lovapaloooza (whatever) thing but i think he doesnt like the idea hahhaha.

    il give this link to my bestie. lol.

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