Ever been in a situation where you step into a room, and three ugly midgets dressed in clown suits hit you on the head with a sledgehammer, and when you come to you are tied to a chair with your eyelids duct taped so that you won’t be able to blink, and then the said midgets would force you to watch lewd sadistic gay clown midget sex acts which of course nobody but Bim likes to watch? No? Neither have I. It happened to a… friend.

But please do try to imagine yourself in that situation. What would you feel? If the first word that come to your head would be “boner”, I would suggest that you would immediately isolate yourself from the rest of humanity and check right away with a psychologist. Because boner isn’t the word I was looking for. The apporpriate feeling to be in a situation like that wouuld be “helplessness” (among, of course, other things like “suicide”, “eye bleach”, “insanity”, and “boner-killer”. But I digress.)


When humans get helplessly tied to a chair, the usual
course of action would be to “not laugh like a douche”.

But yeah, helplessness. That’s what I’m feeling right now. In fact, I shouldn’t be going through that because things have in fact been looking up for me in the last two weeks:

  • I got a new job that requires me to do actual thinking (something I sorely missed)
  • The day job that stabilized my body clock
  • I’m working for a boss who’s actually intelligent (as opposed to my previous one)
  • I’m playing bass in an awesome band
  • Said band has gigs
  • I’m getting drunk every other night and waking up inside a garbage can (good times)

Okay, shit still happens to me like:

  • My phone being stolen
  • My Yahoo! Messenger ID crapping out on me
  • A bunch of rabid dogs chasing me from UP Diliman to my house
  • And my love life still in that awkward stage where you honestly don’t know what the fuck is up.

But still, it’s all good.

Please don’t say that I should learn to count my blessings and stop whining. Trust me, I’m as contented as an obese Mexican having eaten his fifth burrito for lunch. But every now and then, I get the feeling that I’m tied to a chair and I’m helplessly watching life pass me by. Oh yeah, maybe it’s because I’m about to hit 25 in a little more than a month and I feel like I accomplished nothing of consequence? Aging can be such a bitch, don’t you think?

Read More: