Today I am taking a break from retardery and updating you about my latest embarrassment and/or sexual misdemeanour by showing you the greatest thing that was ever invented. No, it’s not the wheel, or even the combustion engine. Atomic bomb? Not even close. Beer? Well, beer’s important, but not close.

Ladies and gents, I present the amazing laptop-humping dog:

You may stare at it for a while and wonder what the heck does it do. Does it save your files? Does it cure cancer? Does it work as a contraceptive? Does it hack into the pentagon’s computer system and start off a thermodynamic nuclear war?

No. Awesome as those possible applications may be, the amazing laptop-humping dog does something even better.

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It humps laptops.

(duh.)

This is such a revelation. Think of the possibilities! Imagine how useful and awesome this is. I swear, whoever invented this deserves a nobel prize or something for most innovative computer thingamajig. So there, tell me, has your mind been blown away?