Noisy, Noisy Man

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If you’ve been following my blog for the longest time you would know that I’ve been making one wrong decision after another, and today I decided to turn my life around. This epiphany that I had this morning is almost like waking up next to Emma Watson.

But, really. I woke up this morning, looked for Emma Watson, was slightly pissed off because she wasn’t there, and – BAM – epiphany. This is probably the most important decision I have ever made and I shall share it with all of you.

Today, I decided to eat salad.

What.

Anyway, what is up with those plastic containers salads are served in? Every salad I buy lately gets progressively harder to open. Somehow, the container gets progressively tighter every time I try prying them open.

These fuckers.

I wish those stupid containers would just open up easily and give up those treasures they contain within. Just like, you know, your mom. Read the rest of this entry »

Flashback to a few months ago:

So The Mordo and I were hanging out at the McDonald’s near the office. Also, we were taking shelter from the rain (and we were finding an excuse to not go back to work) when this Kylie Minogue song played on the muzak. Since we consider ourselves experts on nothing more then the female body and all the joys it imparts, The Mordo and I had a discussion on the apparent hotness of Kylie Minogue (FYI: she’s still hot).

This image is meant to get your attention

Anyway, in the middle of a debate on whether or not a masectomy can reduce Kylie Minogue’s overall hotness (it won’t), we had this rather… interesting discussion:

Mordo: “Listen to her voice, Ade”

Ade: “Yeah, I am, what about it?”

Mordo: “Can’t you hear the hotness?”

Ade: “Er… what?!”

Mordo: “No, listen! Kylie Minogue’s hotness! It oozes out of her voice!” Read the rest of this entry »