Noisy Noisy Man

Ruining The Internet Since 2005

Tag: Facebook



Facebook Places: Oh, The Fun I’ll Have

I’ve never been a huge fan of location sharing services. Yeah, I have a Foursquare account, but I checked in only once, and I was drunk. I quickly lost interest in updating the goddamn site, along with my will to live. I don’t know about you, but telling the world that you’re eating in this restaurant isn’t exactly my idea of fun.

Also, I’ve done my fair share of oversharing on Twitter already (“WHY DOES IT BURN WHEN I PEE DAMMIT”) and sharing the place where I commit yet another hilarious misdeed to yet another major internal organ isn’t going to make my followers any more uncomfortable than they are now.

Fig. 1 – Why Ade doesn’t have friends in Foursquare (and in real life)

However, this newfangled Facebook Places thing is pretty interesting, if you ask me. You see, Facebook Places lets you check in to different places, just like a rich DOM and a college student with no tuition money the many location sharing services available right now, but with a twist: in the spirit of privacy violation that Facebook has been committed to doing for the longest time, Facebook Places lets you tag your friends to various locations – and they can do the same to you.

Continue reading

Moratorium: Liking Your Own Facebook Status

To the people who like their own Facebook statuses, I have one simple question: why?

Please tell me. Are you desperate to have people liking your well-thought of and meticulously researched status (and you researched by googling for “love quotes” – but hey that took up seven minutes of your time, plus that Angelfire page crashed your Internet Explorer and that counts for something, right?) that you have to jumpstart the process by liking it yourself? Continue reading

Facebook Quizzes That Should Never See The Light Of Day

facebook addictWho else here spends their time on Facebook, poking people and making sure that every ounce of possible productivity is wasted? Not you? Fuck.

Okay, since nobody wants to admit surfing Facebook a lot (you fuckers), I’ll just ask you a question: who else is sick of the stupid quizzes that pop up one after another on your timeline? The occasional “Are You A Pervert?” taken by that hot girl who you used to masturbate to back in college would be fine, because her quiz results show that she is, indeed, a pervert. Afterward you go masturbating to the quiz results, but that’s another story.

But yeah, we’re getting way too many stupid quizzes on Facebook. You know what? Quizzes like “What is your name?” or “Did you go to [insert name of school]” or “pAnU k p0h mGmAhAL p0h????????” are just way too abundant on Facebook lately.

Seriously, I wonder how it can get worse. What sort of Facebook quizzes shouldn’t see the light of day? Continue reading

Facebook's New Layout: The 5 Stages of Bitching

So, a few months after the last facelift, Facebook once again changed their layout. And, frankly, people aren’t too happy with the change. So goes another round of interweb bitching about Facebook’s new layout, even if the site is for free and they can do whatever they want with how the site looks. Heck, they can even put a big slab of bacon on the site and they should be able to get away with it.

Bacon Facebook
This is how Facebook should look like, forever.

As I’ve been following the updates of people trying to deal with the new layout, (yes, “deal.” It’s life-changing, didn’t you know?) I’ve noticed a pattern. People go through stages when trying to deal with this major tragedy called “Facebook changed its layout, holy shit, my life is over.”

Denial

Denial
One day, you log on to Facebook, and the layout has changed. it’s no longer the familliar layout you were used to from yesterday. You stare at the screen in shock. You press F5 continuously, hoping that the old layout will go back after a while. You refuse to accept the change.

Anger

Anger
There has got to be somebody to blame. You are seething with anger. You need somebody to hit. You may rail against fate, questioning “Why me?” Continue reading

Anger Management, I Fail At It

I’ve always thought of myself as the most patient person in the world. No, seriously. Just ask my ex girlfriends. (Kidding, ladies. Please don’t kill me.) But I’m becoming really, as in really, cranky and short-tempered as of late and it’s starting to worry me.


Anger. It bursts me at the seams.
 

Take this incident from last week, for instance. I was running late for work and I had to go through another astoundingly mind-numbing human crush over at the legendary MRT morning rush. There have been fables of casualties there, my cellphone being one of them. Anyway, imagine going through a human stampede on a daily basis, plus having to deal with various armpits and the whole gamut of bodily odors can really take its toll. Continue reading

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