Noisy Noisy Man | Your daily dose of retard | Pinoy funny website full of funny articles, funny jokes, funny pictures, funny reviews, and a lot of other funny stuff.

LG Optimus One, GAS Blue Balls

By Ade | Published: November 20, 2010

NOTE: This is a Sponsored Post

As you may or may not know (or care), I went to LG’s 50% off sale of their new Android phones. I know, I know, I still have the Nokia E63. What you don’t know is that my phone’s screen was broken and since it might cost me a bit of money to get it fixed, and I thought I should just get a new phone anyway.

So silly old me had my mind set on having a new and cheap Android phone that it never occurred to me that, you know, it’s a one-hour sale, pretty well-publicized, and the rest of Metro Manila’s a cheapskate like me and they also want their hands on an Android-powered phone that costs less than ten thousand bucks. But I was like, who cares if the rest of humanity wants to get their hands on the stupid phone? I’ll elbow my way till the very end and get my dirty, grubby hands on an LG Optimus One! Read More »

Posted in Personal | Tagged blue balls, crowd, gadget acquisition syndrome, LG 50% off sale, LG Optimus One, megamall, random chat, sponsored | 15 Comments

‘Merry Christmas Na’ by 1:43, Review

By Ade | Published: November 10, 2010

It’s no secret that however wonderful the internet may be, 90% of the things in it are crap. This crap that comprises a huge part of the internet ranges from the mediocre to horrible. In fact, anyone who’s spent more than three hours on it will be desensitized from shitty stuff for life. However, every now and then, something comes out that is so absolutely stupid and bad that it loops back to being hilarious. We feel a bit of our soul dying as we enjoy watching the worst humanity has to offer, but we can’t just stop.

This video, by Filipino boy band 1:43, is one of those things.

Joining me in this review, where we analyze the video and reflect its implication in OPM’s future, is Comicgasm co-editor and, well, owner (he just lets me write shit for free), RJ.

RJ: Dude, 90% of the internet is porn. Why aren’t we talking about porn? We should talk about porn. Oh yeah, before we start embarrassing ourselves, I would like to say that I was FORCED into doing this! :E Why would you even do this, Ade? WHY? D:

Ade: A few hours ago I caught myself humming the chorus of that song as I was walking home. And I was bobbing my head to it. I didn’t want to be the only one with that horrible song in my head, so I looked for someone to share the pain with, RJ. And you’re a funny writer.

RJ: You’re just taking advantage of my kind-hearted demeanor. And maybe this is your way of taking revenge for all those times I sent you pics of hot women with penises.

Ade: Actually, you’re just my most gullible friend. Ok, review? Write for free?

RJ: 2 handjobs or no deal.

Ade: K. Read More »

Posted in Reviews, Specials | Tagged 1:43, group review, k-pop, lito camo, merry christmas na, music video, p-pop, rain, review, wondergirls | 84 Comments

Inner Child Therapy: Life and Other Aimless Stuff

By Ade | Published: November 3, 2010

Hello readers! Yes, the both of you. I know I haven’t been able to update as much as I wanted, but I’ve been so busy lately that when I have to update this blog, I draw blanks left and right. And I’m forced to write unfunny filler posts. You guys don’t deserve filler posts, you are such a wonderful bunch of readers, and it’s cheating if I just churn out another half-assed- what the hell, here’s another filler.

NOTE: This is a Sponsored Post

This is the part where I’m supposed to write a nice intro, but here’s some pretty text. You like text? Because I do. I really do. Look! Letters! Words! Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit! And here’s the sentence that’s supposed to transition this blog post into another conversation between me and my inner child, and here’s the abrupt shift, get ready for it!

Ade: Would you believe it? 2010′s almost over!
Inner Child: Oh I do, I do.
Ade: I can’t believe how quickly this year went.
Inner Child: I don’t know, man. I never really noticed.
Ade: How so?
Inner Child: There’s this little fact that you blogged about me only once this year.
Ade: I was busy, okay?
Inner Child: Fapping off to Maria Ozawa collection? Yes, you were.
Ade: What? No! I… I was busy working. You know, jobs? That thing that makes me earn money so I can stay financially secure and lets me eat at Mister Kebab as much as I want? Also, I’m over Maria Ozawa. Tina Yuzuki all the way!

Tina Yuzuki

Tina YuzHHHHNNNNNNGHHHH

Inner Child: The only jobs I know are the ones that start with blow. Hyuk-hyuk!
Ade: … that’s so mature, kid.
Inner Child: You may not have noticed this, Ade, but I am a kid. Read More »

Posted in Specials, Stuff | Tagged band, dick drawing in the arm, Drug Rehab, gig, inner child, jewel, Meiday, sponsored, the strangeness | 3 Comments

Time Travel With Ade: A Terrifying Vision of the Future if the RH Bill Becomes Law

By Ade | Published: October 5, 2010

I woke up with a headache. I stood up from the ground, and I felt a bit dizzy. I have no idea what happened – I was drinking, and I had the brilliant idea to tie a bunch of fireworks to this contraption I made. Okay, so it was a broken-down photocopier with two dildos, a box of Pocky, my neighbor’s dog, and multicolored paperclips glued all over it.

As I walked around, I realized that I was no longer in my house. In fact, I recognized nothing. It’s like I was in the middle of some post-apocalyptic wasteland.

“Hello?” I shouted, trying to reach anybody. I know I put a lot of gunpowder in the toner cartridge of that copier, but the stupid thing blowing up the entire city? I don’t think so. Then I saw two men walking towards me rather apprehensively. I waved at them. They waved back. I ran to their direction, and when I was near they shouted my name. Read More »

Posted in Stuff | Tagged church, current events, post-apocalyptic world, reproductive health bill, RH Bill, satire, time travel | 16 Comments

Ade’s Christmas Wish List 2010

By Ade | Published: September 22, 2010

The moment I heard Jose Mari Chan’s Christmas in Our Hearts played over the muzak, I realized that it’s almost Christmas again. Well, that was fast. This year, though, I’m not looking forward to Christmas. It probably has something to do with me not getting any gifts worth mentioning last Christmas.

Except for this:

So I heard you like playing the guitar…

Also, Santa’s a douche. Although nobody’s been giving me anything that’s on my Christmas wish lists for the last three years, I’m still going to write down the things I want.

Why? I don’t know. For posterity?