INNER CHILD: Geez, you look horrible. What’s up?
ME: … I can’t write.
INNER CHILD: Seriously?
ME: Yeah.
INNER CHILD: No way. Writer’s block much?
ME: Yes, okay? Now get off my back and stop badgering me.
INNER CHILD: You’re mean.
ME: No, seriously. I’ve been staring at this goddamn laptop for days already and I can’t come up with anything decent. So please stop bugging me okay?
INNER CHILD: You’ve been staring at the laptop for… days?
ME: Of course I was exaggerating.
INNER CHILD: Did you take a bath or something?
ME: I… uh, WHAT?
INNER CHILD: Coz you’re on computer for days!
ME: I told you, I was exagg-
INNER CHILD: LOLOLOLOLOLOL!11
ME: Hey kid-
INNER CHILD: HEY GUYS! ADE HERE DID NOT LEAVE HIS COMPUTER FOR DAYS!
ME: That’s kinda not true, kiddo-
INNER CHILD: HE DID NOT TAKE A BATH!
ME: HEY!
INNER CHILD: AND HE ATE NOTHING BUT MINISTOP SIOPAO SO NOW HE’S GONNA BE FAT- errr – FATTER!
ME: …
INNER CHILD: WHAAAAAAAAAAAAT?
ME: You, kid, are making shit up about me already.
INNER CHILD: Can’t you see the irony?
ME: What irony?
INNER CHILD: I’m more imaginative than you at the moment.
ME: …so?
INNER CHILD: It’s pretty sad when your id is actually more creative than you.
ME: …
INNER CHILD: What?
ME: … I hate you.

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