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Feeling down and lonely? Got no friends? Fat? Pimply? Ugly? Small boobs?

“My life sucks. I have no social life, my friends hate me, and my sex life is limited to my hand.”

Jimbo is just one of the many losers littering our great country. He is suffering from a sickness called loseroticism, and it is wreaking havoc not just on his life, but on the life of millions of losers around the world.


Dr. Sam Peth, Medical Expert:
“Yes, loseroticism is such a big pandemic right now I wonder why they haven’t quarantined the whole world. In fact, I will show you this vague scientific-type-table-graph-thingie to prove my point.”


“I didn’t understand a thing, but I guess it means I’m screwed. I’ll slash my wrists now, kthnxbai.”

But wait! We have a solution for you!

Available for the first time in the Philippines, FAG (Facial Astringent Grease) will help you in your social life. It’s mix of dehydrating and anti-oxidants will cleanse your face and rid you of loseroticism!


Proper FAG cream application

Just check out the before and after pictures of some satisfied customers:

*****


“OMG! I will try it now! Thank you, FAG!”

FAG is available for the low, low, LOW price of 9,999.99 Pesos. See? It’s so cheap you don’t even have to spend ten grand on it! Also, buy ONE for the price of TWO and get one absolutely FREE!

So what are you waiting for? Dial 1-800-FAG-6969 and start spreading that FAG cream all over your face!

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18 Comments

  1. ade

    [quote comment="4916"]hahahahahahahaha hahahhahahaha hahahahahaha hahahahahaha….yun lang :D[/quote]

    Dude! I edited your comment because you are raping my margins.

  2. Wala na bang tawad yan?

  3. hahahahahahahaha hahahhahahaha hahahahahaha hahahahahaha….yun lang 😀

  4. pwede bang libre na lang? tulong naman ako sa promotion e 🙂

  5. I need FAG!~_~

  6. 9,999.99 pesoses That's a lot eh!? ala bang tag 9 pesos ( di bale na raw mag mukhang kambing basta may resulta)hehehe

  7. Wow! This FAG thingy works wonders indeed! So what do the Hoff and Sam have to say about this?

  8. hahaha, nakakaaliw ang ang produckto! mukhang yayaman ka dito…

  9. gusto ko mag avail nyan, hehehe,. basta magiging kamukha ko si papa SAM

  10. hahaha. wow! it's so cheap ha. and the results are amazing! 🙂

  11. I find it gross too. But I guess to each his own "sexual fantasies". FYI, facial cumming may also spread HIV when the semen reaches the eyes. Make sure to close your eyes then. Haha!

  12. what the heck? the before and after shots are pretty awesome.. napapabilib ako! HAHAHHAHAHA!!!

    by the way, yung friend kong si Quyen (she's Vietnemese) lang ba ang cute?.. bakit yung isa kong friend si Kristin and syempre ako, ndi ba kami cute ren? Hahaha!!! Kristin is pretty, I think she looks like Julia Roberts.

  13. Errgh. Gross. I know semen is acidic. Like, she had to gargle the tiny tadpoles in her mouth…. arrrgh.

  14. ade

    [quote comment="4644"]“My life sucks. I have no social life, my friends hate me, and my sex life is limited to my hand.”

    (kssk kssk. evil clouds spreading. thunderstorms. mouthbubbles. Gilgamesh and Belzeebub.) Are you insulting me?[/quote]

    Mouth bubbles?

    <img src="http://img228.imageshack.us/img228/8940/bukkakebubblesvz7.jpg&quot; alt="" />

    [quote comment="4606"]you do know that "soft" men will now jack off to your blog because you've posted sam milby's picpic, right?[/quote]

    Holy crap! You're right!

  15. “My life sucks. I have no social life, my friends hate me, and my sex life is limited to my hand.”

    (kssk kssk. evil clouds spreading. thunderstorms. mouthbubbles. Gilgamesh and Belzeebub.) Are you insulting me?

    ——

    Hahaha. So hilarious. Keeping the faggotry in the Piolo Pascual federation. Hahahaha.

    The guy with the spectacles perturbs me. Aaargh.

  16. Chismax:

    That guy with bag is err….. not straight

    but wait there is more

    all of them are not….. straight

  17. you do know that "soft" men will now jack off to your blog because you've posted sam milby's picpic, right?

  18. I still don't get why some guys get all excited about facial cum shots. It's quite disgusting.

    And who are these people on the left?! LOL. Borrowed some pics from Mikey's old Atrocities of Friendster? Hehehe.

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