An Open Letter to the Dude who was Fingering his Girlfriend on the MRT

24 Jun

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This entry is part 10 of 12 in the series Open Letters

Dear dude who was fingering his girlfriend on the MRT,

First off, I applaud you. It takes much effort to doodle the noodle in public. Really. I mean, with all the people around seeing you excavate the Tunnel of Love, it takes guts. You’ve got balls of steel to solder on while people turn away in disgust.

You see, I was beside you today while waiting for the train. You, me, your girlfriend, and a huge crowd. I kinda knew you were double-clicking her mouse because she was squirming all over the damn place. Hiding her crotch with her big-ass bag was a nice touch, though. It really made the scene more obvious, but still, nice touch.

No, I wasn’t talking about your touch. Ass.

So finally, the train entered the station (hyuk, hyuk, I made a funneh) and I tried to get away as far from you two as possible. Goddammit, why the hell did you two decide to get a seat in front of me where I can see you two flip the light switch repeatedly? And OF COURSE you had to stop digging in so you two can put on shades. Yeah, like that’ll hide your identity. Very subtle, really.

What I really want to say is that you should turn it down a notch. You see, the harmonious hand hump may be lots of fun, but dude, it’s freaking 10 in the morning. The last thing people want to see on their way to a busy workday would be a happy couple, lost in their own world, dialing the rotary phone. This isn’t Japan, where fingerbanging 20-something year old strangers wearing schoolgirl outfits on the train is a hallowed tradition, according to their porno videos. On a good day, you might even find yourself doing the bukkake there.



Japan.

Okay, I may be too harsh on you. So let me end this by congratulating you again. You have a massive pair for pulling that stunt off. I also applaud your girlfriend’s hygiene; the train didn’t smell like fish. That’s a compliment for you two right there. My only regret is that I wasn’t able to pull out my phone and take a video of you two. I sure hope somebody else was able to do that, though. I’ll keep an eye on the bluetooth porn sharing network and on fleshasiadaily.com for your eventual rise to stardom via low quality .3gp video.

Enjoy your subsequent expeditions in the ring of fire,
Ade

Series Navigation«An Open Letter to my Neighbor’s Stupid DogAn Open Letter To Our Future Zombie Overlords»
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53 Responses to “An Open Letter to the Dude who was Fingering his Girlfriend on the MRT”

  1. Rico 24. Jun, 2009 at 2:17 pm #

    We congratulate this guy with a hearty NUKS NUMUN!!!!

  2. Baguio 24. Jun, 2009 at 3:16 pm #

    I second! UKS NUMUN!

  3. greyweed 24. Jun, 2009 at 3:19 pm #

    WTF!? This seriously happen??? Holy jebuz!

  4. mitch 24. Jun, 2009 at 3:20 pm #

    Wow. Definitely gutsy! Did the occasional stops in every station hinder the performance? Hahaha!

  5. Sha 24. Jun, 2009 at 3:34 pm #

    As in the finger penetrated? I doubt. Haha. But this is funny. lol.

  6. Jewel 24. Jun, 2009 at 3:51 pm #

    HEEHEEHEE. I giggle. That’s all.

  7. bob 24. Jun, 2009 at 4:08 pm #

    maybe these guys have hyper hormones…

    kanya kanyang trip lang yan pre. ^^

  8. cars 24. Jun, 2009 at 4:24 pm #

    for real? O_O
    that’s all.

  9. Euri 24. Jun, 2009 at 4:52 pm #

    WOAH! Way to go dude! Next time, remember to record it please! And just tell them, “para sa school project po namin ito.” =P

  10. randell 24. Jun, 2009 at 5:01 pm #

    Disappointing. Always, and I mean ALWAYS, be ready to pull out your camera phone for events like this.

  11. Tuna Caserole 24. Jun, 2009 at 5:01 pm #

    Wow! Rocks! \m/

  12. Bryan Karl 24. Jun, 2009 at 7:58 pm #

    Waaag ang lakas ng loob nila… And nice open letter! \m/

  13. toni 25. Jun, 2009 at 12:59 am #

    “I also applaud your girlfriend’s hygiene; the train didn’t smell like fish.” — LOL ADE!!!

  14. joyfulchicken 25. Jun, 2009 at 1:26 am #

    Oh well, at least it wasn’t one dude playing with himself.

  15. Joel Avatari 25. Jun, 2009 at 1:26 am #

    You should have asked if they needed a hand… or just a finger.

    LOLz.

  16. Kimmy 25. Jun, 2009 at 6:08 am #

    EEW and LOLZ :D

  17. Jhay 25. Jun, 2009 at 8:56 am #

    That’s nothing compared to what you can witness on provincial buses that fly EDSA all the way to Batangas. There’s a reason why some couples prefer to jam their bodies through the standing passengers just to get to the back of the bus. People are so anxious to get home, irate because they’re already like in a sardine can, a lot of miracles can happen in seat next or behind you.

    And mind you, this kind of thing is not restricted to heterosexual couples. LOLZ

  18. Lizz 25. Jun, 2009 at 10:29 am #

    This troubles me. Someone should tell that couple to limit their antics to the inside of their car. No one wants to see that. :P

  19. loudcloud 25. Jun, 2009 at 12:50 pm #

    hahahahahaha!

    ade i just wanna kick you in the face for NOT taking the video yourself and get rich selling it in quiapo! what incense me more is the fact that my profit participation slid to limbo as well!

    squandered fortune. how can you be so headless?! argh.

    LOL.

    this entry totally made my day, btw!

  20. Papapau 26. Jun, 2009 at 10:51 am #

    kakairita lang kaya pag wala vid.. we can treat ths as fiction.. but well said and this will remind the ninjas oh and everyone na rin to… ALWAYS BE READY TO GET YOUR CAMERAPHONE for times like this.. ehehe.

  21. Cheska 26. Jun, 2009 at 1:35 pm #

    love the post, ade. miss you much! update me on you know what, k? mwahugs!

  22. Jorge 26. Jun, 2009 at 4:21 pm #

    dooood, this post is dope…makes me wanna write about the girl beside me in the bus trying to dry hump her semi-unconscious boyfriend…

  23. ark 26. Jun, 2009 at 9:53 pm #

    Sayang di mo nakunan ng video! Hehe..

  24. Winkie 26. Jun, 2009 at 10:23 pm #

    did this really happen? if so, grabe naman yun at umaga pa talaga ang pinggeran! hehehe! ang sarap sabihan ng “hey, you two really need a room!” hehehe!

    • supersawsaw 02. Jul, 2009 at 1:10 am #

      That’s what I want to ask, too. Did it happen in MRT in EDSA or LRT in Taft or LRT2?

      If this is true, I congratulate the guy. Shyet na malagkit. Ang galing niya! At isa pa tanong ko. Girlfriend kaya nya yung kinakalikot nya?

  25. Jappy 27. Jun, 2009 at 8:43 am #

    @Papapau: kelangan pa bang idamay mga ninja? :D

    siguro mga adik yun haha, wait, maganda ba yung girl? tsaka worthy ba mukha ni papa?

  26. beejing 28. Jun, 2009 at 1:45 pm #

    LOL. I applaud the confidence.

  27. billycoy 29. Jun, 2009 at 12:43 pm #

    i know why you don’t like to see them doing that, they’re ugly ‘no? eh kung mala-maria ozawa ba naman kasi ang babae baka mapakambyo ka rin.

  28. pagchur! 29. Jun, 2009 at 12:58 pm #

    the bukake part was hilarious! :D japan is lovely like that.

  29. nugget-happy 29. Jun, 2009 at 7:27 pm #

    that’s just eew. MRT people talaga oh. haha.

  30. Pau 01. Jul, 2009 at 11:45 am #

    I like the like function of your blog. I shall copy.

  31. lio loco 06. Jul, 2009 at 2:46 pm #

    you did not join in the steamy fray, did you? huhlolz!

  32. mister poo 07. Jul, 2009 at 7:36 am #

    Awesome the way you used the different ways of saying “masturbation”.

    doodle the noodle
    double click the mouse
    flipping the switch.

    great! :)

  33. deejay 07. Jul, 2009 at 3:51 pm #

    waaaaah! grabedad. sana nga binidyo mo. o kahit pichur man lang, hehehe. pero ade, di mo kwinento kung ano ichura nila. yuppies? jologs? 20s? teens? oldies? (in which case… ew) hehehe.

  34. philos 13. Jul, 2009 at 12:06 am #

    Haha… You know what would be cool? If the guy (or the girl) came by your open letter and tried to make a blog response (ala youtube) hehe…

    • Ade 13. Jul, 2009 at 1:40 pm #

      Or even better, the girlfriend!

  35. Cesar Noel 14. Jul, 2009 at 12:14 pm #

    Devil’s hand hehehe

  36. Syve 19. Jul, 2009 at 8:56 am #

    tsk tsk tsk… yun lang

  37. Raymund 09. Aug, 2009 at 1:27 pm #

    i stumbled upon a pair of college kids doing the same thing inside the bus bound for cavite…

  38. mandz 06. Sep, 2009 at 10:48 am #

    i guess they are exhibitionists? dunno.. hehe.

    nyweiz

    at least you didn’t get carried away. haha, some men would have been very very very grateful if they were you. haha

    like their “tongtong” would have been so hard, alive and kicking.. hahah

  39. drimmmmer 12. Oct, 2009 at 5:40 pm #

    I also witnessed similar stunt in my SocSci I class. These two seatmates bf-gf-fat-retards-konyos were enjoying the seventh heaven at 11:30am-1:00pm sked, TTh! OMG, I cannot forget their faces and her controlled silent moans as he carefully pressed the button of her left boob. Her big baffle bag on the arm chair was big enough to hide the semestral adventure while his skilled dextrous fingers did the fun. Hello? I was sitting next to you on the last row..Dedma lang ko pero, nakikita k kau..Youre lucky though ksi Bosch pa lang cell ko nun. Malamang nasa Youtube na kau ngaun…kakatuwa kau.eeew…

    • drimmmmer 12. Oct, 2009 at 5:41 pm #

      i meant duffle bag

    • tepishane 24. Nov, 2009 at 8:31 pm #

      hahahaha…. The only ‘live show’ i witnessed was between two dogs (one of them mine). My brother and I watched them as they made our garage into a motel. Well, bata pa kami nun kaya we thought it was really funny. The dogs would scurry to another place. Atleast my dog and her partner had dignity. :3

      • tepishane 24. Nov, 2009 at 8:33 pm #

        (errata)* the dogs would scurry to another place WHENEVER THEY HEARD US LAUGHING…

  40. tepishane 24. Nov, 2009 at 8:27 pm #

    WHAT THE? You saw us?

    joke lang. XP

    People are becoming more and more liberated by the minute. grabe. I hope they’d do that in US or somewhere else where that level of ‘affection’ would be just ordinary.

    P.S. post a link if you see their vid. hahaha. My imagination kinda transmits a blurry image on my head. XD Love your blog, btw.

    • tepishane 24. Nov, 2009 at 8:31 pm #

      *I meant “in”…. in my head. LOL

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