My Songwriting Skills Need Work
25 May
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Every weekend, my bandmates and I meet up in one of those coffee shops scattered in the metro. Aside from playing Gino Padilla’s “Closer You And I” ad nauseam, we also try to write songs.
My bandmates, in my opinion, are badass songwriters. They can take one mundane situation like “I was about to cross the road when this jeepney stops in front of me and wouldn’t let me pass; the driver parked there for a good two minutes, blocking my way, until he realized that I wasn’t going to ride his stupid jeepney” into a pretty tight song:
(Don’t mind the stupid-looking bassist, k?)
On the other hand, I am a bit lacking in the songwriting department. The last good song I made was written a little more than a decade ago, called “Ang Brip Ko Ay Hindi Pink… Pulang Malabnaw Lang ‘To,” and it dealt with a guy trying to prove his masculinity by showing the world that his underwear was not pink, it was just dipped in the bleach for too long.
You wouldn’t believe how frustrated I get whenever I manage to start off a nice riff on my guitar and I strum the stupid tune for fifteen minutes straight, while no melody whatsoever comes out of my head. If there is such a thing as Musical Blue Balls, that would be it.
Don’t even ask me about my lyrics. One time I tried to write a nuanced, subtle song about abortion, and the difficulties in making a choice. I tried to make it so that it won’t come off as preachy or anything. I just wanted to write a song about making an agonizing choice.
Instead I ended up writing it from the point of view of the fetus. And I actually called the song “In China They Eat Me”
Served with fettuccine
Now that I’ve probably angered all the Chinese readers of my blog by, you know, implying that they eat fetuses, I’ll probably just hide in some bunker where I’ll try to write more songs. Maybe about Russian mail-order brides this time.
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Tags: band, blue balls, china, gig, in china they eat me, lose your beer belly, music, otherside by lose your beer belly, songwriting
Where’s the fansclub? Where do I sign up? =P
Hindi, kupas na red yan! XP
ZOMG WE HAVE A FANS CLUB NAO! MADE UP OF.. one member. You.
Okay, next gig, you’re the first person I’ll invite!
lahat tayo nagaganyan minsan. siguro humaba lang nang malupet yung sayo, pero ok lang yan. kulang lang sa damo yung baka mo kaya walang gatas pag piniga. bigyan mo kasi ng damo men~
Dude, just listened to your band’s EP. Galing.
Wow, you rawrck like Fred! Get it? Fred? Ok I stop nao.
… what?
You are so gonna get banned from entering the Philippines. Wait, what?
And maybe get threatened with physical harm by a certain Senator as well? Cool!
Maybe you and Mr. Alec Baldwin can go get married and make more babies together.
You mean little racist babies?
no. slave babies,
Bassists are not meant to be lyricists. JK. It’s alright, man. You’ll come around. Meantime, I can volunteer as a roadie or bouncer. that’s pro bono. we’ll have another talk when you release your EP, mmk?
Nahiya naman akong gawin kang roadie! Punta ka na lang pag may gig kami!
Was it really necessary to use the word retard? I’m giving you the
benefit of the doubt here but certainly you know that the word
retard used as slang is extremely hurtful to people living with
special needs. Before I had a child with a disability, I pretty much
was like you. I don’t know if I used the word but I certainly didn’t
flinch when I heard it. What’s the big deal, right? It is a huge
deal to people who have cognitive challenges. They get what you are
saying and they understand that you are mocking them, even if it’s
unintentional.
Anyway, thank you for hearing me out.
K.
uPLoAd Da tAbZzzZZzzz Puhlezzzz… aNd LyreeeKks pOo.. ThEnk You Po.. xoxo mwahugz.
gAgAw1n k0h yAnzzZzZZZzzz. rAkEnR0LL \m/
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
LOLWUT?
“I was about to cross the road when this jeepney stops in front of me and wouldn’t let me pass; the driver parked there for a good two minutes, blocking my way, until he realized that I wasn’t going to ride his stupid jeepney” into a pretty tight song…”
– - – How legendary rockstars are made.
I do hope we become legendary.
I need to hear that pink underwear song. Please?
It’ll be our first single, just you wait and see.
nyaha! are the lyrics posted somewhere here? i’d love to see that! :D
LOL at “in china they eat me.” ang subtle nga! :P
Actually, dapat nga “In India They Eat Me,” pero di naman kasi kumakain ng fetus ang mga Indians eh. Ayaw naman namin mag-kalat ng mali-maling racial stereotypes.
i play the piano, and I composed an instrumental piece entitled, “The Last Thing I’d do in my life is Jellyfihing”
wla lang. haha. naalala ko lang. lol.