Tell me if you haven’t felt this when starting a new relationship after a series of failed ones: your past failures, whether real or imagined, will always come back to haunt you. Granted, the new girlfriend will most definitely be not be like my exes (Psychotic stalker-ish otaku ex? Psuedo-fashionista with absolutely no fashion sense at all and with an IQ of a turnip? Come on), but still, everyone comes from a string of failed relationships, and we all can’t help but blame ourselves from time to time.

fighting couple

Lemme ask you guys, who here hasn’t been through a shitty relationship before? We all get the urge to start a new one, but in the back of our head, we’d all have fears and insecurities every now and then. Fears like “you’ll just add this relationship into your big list of failures” or “goddammit you blow. At sex.” or “remember that time when you tried to buy roses and ended up in a car crash?” or “holy shit your penis isn’t big enough” or “Ade you better stop writing about this because you’re just opening a can of worms.”

But then, why should we be worried? We all learn a lot of things from the past right? The little yet important things like “the bird goes into the funhole, not the chocolate express”. And I also learned to check for bees when I give girls those flowers I stole from my neighbor’s lawn. I never heard from the girl again, though.

Do not insert screwdriver into penis
Another thing I learned

 

But seriously though, how bad can it get? The past is past and I’ve learned a lot. I think. I mean, I’ve learned what pisses women off (demonstrating your astounding burping skills is not the way to go, sry2sy) and what makes them tick (I’m think of something. Wait). So I think I’ve got a handle on this. No, really.

Anyway, I don’t think I’m gonna end up like this guy anytime soon:

EPIC FAIL

 

Which is a nice change of pace. I actually feel awesome.

What do you think?

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24 comments to “New Relationships, Ghosts of Girlfriends Past”

  1. Juice says:

    You feel awesome because you’re in love, Ade. Teehee. I like to read the serious side of you.. it’s fun. As cliché as it may sound, everything happens for a reason right? The good, the bad and the ugly.. happens to every relationship. The best thing is just to savor it because it’s gonna be a learning lesson no matter how it ends.

    *I barf at myself* :P Good luck Ade :D

  2. reekah says:

    i suppose you get more courage when you want to have the girl so badly… in the process, you feel awesome. coz to feel that certain amount of bravery is really overwhelmingly nice. :)

    reekah’s last blog post..I Miss Home

  3. Abbie says:

    Uuuuy, Ade! :D Love is always a gamble. Enjoy it while you have it and damn hope (and pray) for the BEST!

  4. Burping doesn’t impress women? Now you tell me :-(

  5. wow! serious post. niiice!

    cigarette-girl’s last blog post..Dear readers, a lesson on Plagiarism

  6. jhay says:

    Aw….the noisy, noisy guy is in love?

    in love?! Oh God save us! LOLZ

    seriously dude, it’s nice to know things are turning out good for you.

  7. Steel says:

    What your ex abhorred might be cool with your new flame (like burping vulgarly). Risk is what makes you discover and accept each other’s flaws.

    Like I told that Baddie character, you need not dwell on your past failures. A whole new world of failure awaits! SMILE!

  8. Ken Lovell says:

    Gosh dude, with such a mature non-condescending attitude to women I can’t imagine why you might have had relationship problems in the past.

    Some blokes … honestly.

  9. toniii says:

    “demonstrating your astounding burping skills is not the way to go, sry2sy”

    —> what!? that’s cute kaya!!! haha.

  10. Helga says:

    Best of luck, dod. ZOMG @ the animated gif. Trying not to LMAO here. In da opis.

    Helga’s last blog post..MOVIES, I.

  11. Sorsi says:

    wow, at last=) congrats!=P But I feel sorry for the unfortunate girl;)

    what about ghosts of never-been-but-coulda-shoulda-woulda-if-i-weren’t-chicken’s=P hahaha!

    How are your fans/stalkers holding up?

    hope to see you again online=P im always busy doing homework when i see you=P

  12. van says:

    one word: Yiheeeeeeee ..lol

    *hums Donna Cruz’s Kapag Tumibok ang Puso*

  13. pixiedust says:

    Granted, the new girlfriend will most definitely be not be like my exes (Psychotic stalker-ish otaku ex? Psuedo-fashionista with absolutely no fashion sense at all and with an IQ of a turnip? Come on),

    huwaat? where do i belong here??? hahaha!!!!! How would you describe moi?

  14. mmaca says:

    i do hope so :)

    awful that i can see myself as bordering to the psycho ex u were referring to gahh. i think there’s a varying degree of psycho ex in all ladies. hahaha.

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