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So we walked in the bar with absolutely no practice and no idea what will happen. My bandmates were quite apprehensive.
“Ade”, one of them said. “What the hell are we doing here?”
I reply with “We’re gonna play. Isn’t that what we’re here for?”
“Yes dude I know that, but what are we here for?” he counters.
“What do you mean?”
“What are we in this world for? Why are we living this life? What is our God-given purpose?”
“Dude, what the fuck.”
I stared at my bandmate blankly for a couple of minutes. He was looking back at me quite earnestly.
“Man,” he said “our lives- everything- is meaningless. We all turn to dust in the end. So why do we struggle on with our lives? We do not have a higher purpose. We are but a waste of oxygen.”
Waste of oxygen
“So what do you propose?” I said.
“We live the Rock Star Mantra.”
“Ah,” I said, finally understanding my bandmate’s point. “The Rock Star Mantra. You mean Sex, Drugs, and Rock n’ Roll?”
Now my it was bandmate’s turn to stare at me in an incredulous manner.
“Ade, Sex, Drugs, and Rock n’ Roll is old. We have a new mantra nowadays.”
“And that is…?”
He pauses for dramatic effect.
“Porn, Meds, and Rock n’ Roll.”
At this point, I started to laugh uncontrollably.
“What the hell?!” I giggled. “That makes so much sense! You make as much sense as PENIS!”
“No, dude, this is our new mantra.”
“Okay. Porn, Meds and Rock n’ Roll eh? Can you explain that to me? Why did you replace Sex with Porn, for instance.”
“Well, for starters, we may be rockstars, but we. Just. Can’t. Frigging. Get. Laid. So we have to settle for porn.”
“I dunno about you, but I was able to score yesterday–”
“Ade, your right hand doesn’t count.”
“…”
“Your left hand doesn’t count either.”
“Okay, okay! So… why Meds instead of Drugs?”
“Dude, drugs are evil! Didn’t your mom ever told you to not do drugs?”
“No. But that’s what your mom told me.”
“We’ll just crush Diatabs capsules and snort them instead. Dude, I tell you, the high is amazing.”
“…Diatabs?”
“You, know, what you take if you’re shitting like you’ve never shit before—”
“I know what they are, but why?”
“Because we’re rockstars, do we ever need a reason?”
At this point we were called out of the band room and proceeded to play a horrible set. Afterwards we were pelted with rotten tomatoes and one-peso coins. We got so depressed that we got so drunk afterwards. I forgot what happened after the fourth bottle of beer, but I passed out after that hot girl in a pink skirt slapped my face because I tried to sell her some of my Awesome Ade Juice. But I’m quite thankful that there were no midgets during the gig to insult me and all. Because I’d cry if that happened. :(
Anyway, my point is that I just wanted to say that I have an awesome rockstar-ish photo taken from last night.
Move along people, nothing to see here. Move along.
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17 Comments
Porn rehabilitation through meds? Works for me.
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Ade has man tits.
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Um, is that W*lf looking up adoringly at you? o_O
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Which bar is that and what’s your band?
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[quote comment="72708"]Which bar is that and what’s your band?[/quote]
That’s in Bagaberde. And our band’s name is “Crazy Monkey Girl”.
No we don’t have regular gigs in Bagaberde. We just played in a company event.
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Kudos on the gig. We could all only dream to be as cool as the guys on the first pic.
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I pop everything in sight when I’m drunk. Medicine jars need to be hidden from me.
Now snorting Diatabs. That’s something new.
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Oh no! The comeback of the jologs pic! Ade, you should have stuck out your tongue and made the ‘RAWK ON!’ sign. LOL ;)
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How’s the “rock n’ roll” lifestyle? Any stalkers yet!? Hehe…
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Ade i didnt know you played the guitarrr!! and snorting diatabs? WTF?
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[quote comment="72793"]Kudos on the gig. We could all only dream to be as cool as the guys on the first pic.[/quote]
I know. *sigh*
[quote comment="72795"]I pop everything in sight when I’m drunk. Medicine jars need to be hidden from me.
Now snorting Diatabs. That’s something new.[/quote]
Wanna try it out sometime?
[quote comment="72797"]Oh no! The comeback of the jologs pic! Ade, you should have stuck out your tongue and made the ‘RAWK ON!’ sign. LOL ;)[/quote]
I actually have one, but… I wouldn’t show it to you for the life of me. =P
[quote comment="72809"]How’s the “rock n’ roll” lifestyle? Any stalkers yet!? Hehe…[/quote]
Gusto mo sayo na lang?
[quote comment="72828"]Ade i didnt know you played the guitarrr!! and snorting diatabs? WTF?[/quote]
That, my dear, is a bass. ;)
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Ade, ewan ko ba… pare-pareho kayo ng mga bandmate mo na sira ulo! :)
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[quote comment="72797"]Oh no! The comeback of the jologs pic! Ade, you should have stuck out your tongue and made the ‘RAWK ON!’ sign. LOL ;)[/quote]
I actually have one, but… I wouldn’t show it to you for the life of me. =P
Whhyyy noootttt!!! I’m dying to see it. Haha.
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Whhyyy noootttt!!! I’m dying to see it. Haha.[/quote]
Cos I haves my dignity?
… okay, I’ll email.
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Wanna try it out some time? Next TMB Celebraganza? Yes?
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[quote comment="72991"]Wanna try it out some time? Next TMB Celebraganza? Yes?[/quote]
That would be awesome. Also mix in some Biogesic. :P
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the dude besides you in the pict, he’s looking at you like he wants to…uhmmmnnn… are there any kids reading this?
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[...] “Ah,” I said, finally understanding my bandmate’s point. “The Rock Star Mantra. You mean Sex, Drugs, and Rock n’ Roll?” Read the rest of this entry » [...]
[...] sober. Yeah. Shut up. And I’m definitely not stoned, because I haven’t snorted crushed Diatabs in ages. So that leaves me with only one [...]