Know Your Jologs: People Who Should Be Taken Out Of Their Misery

6 May

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This entry is part 4 of 4 in the series Know Your Jologs

If you’ve noticed, most of the people I’ve dissed in my previous Know Your Jologs installations have been men. I’ve done that for two reasons– one, I really consider myself as a gentleman in real life and I would never try to piss off women and that carries off online but I’m really just a pussy; and two, the women I found are just too horrible and I wouldn’t want to inflict upon my awesome readers (yes, the both of you) the pain I suffered.

But then I realized that I am evil and shit and I do want to inflict lots of mental and bodily harm on you and I will just go on and post them anyway. Because I hate you like that.

Now since I’ll be dissing females in this edition of “Know Your Jologs”, to help me would be Liz who turned out to be just as awesome and retarded as any other male Man Blog Editor. Must be penis envy.

ADE: As you can see, this girl tried to show the world how awesome she is in giving blowjobs. She miserably failed to convince anyone.
LIZ: What the fuck is that? It looks too nice to know what a blow job is.
ADE: Either it’s a blowjob it was a little too hungry.
ADE: And ingested the nearest source of protein.
LIZ: So what happens when teeth are all thats left of it?
ADE: You know the fake teeth Joker wears in the first Batman movie? I guess that’s what happens.
LIZ: Dude i just came from a crap and I don’t know whether i should strangle you from where you work, but all this is making me feel horrible.
LIZ: Maybe I should try it? Eat myself?
LIZ: BUT ILL GET FUCKING FAT.
LIZ: Dilemma.

ADE: Lookit that neck.
LIZ: You know dude, I feel for her. I’ve had that thingummy before.
LIZ: Its called skin asthma you insensitive moran.
ADE: I have skin asthma on my arms y’know, but my arms don’t look like they’re dismembered.
LIZ: Good point. maybe it’s make-up, do you think?
LIZ: These tacky studio pics, pfft.
ADE: Naaah. Methinks it’s a ghost.
ADE: Or Photoshop
ADE: She put on another head on that body
ADE: Maybe it’s really Antonio Trillanes hiding his MySpace from the world!
LIZ: But Antonio Trillianes has no innarnets in jail!
ADE: He has intarnets. In his mind! Didn’t you knoes? He is a mutants!
LIZ: He is not a mutants! He is a senatoriable! Moar fuckin disgusting that a fuckin mutant.
ADE: mutants = senatoriable >> what’s the fucking diffarents? They’re both spawns of a toxic spill.

LIZ: I SEE DIGS, MY DEAD CHIHUAHUA
ADE: Where? In the pink area?
LIZ: fucker in the face. in the face. digs used to give me the same look when he wanted a belly scratch, the gods rest his soul
ADE: I don’t want to give that thing a belly scratch
ADE: Who knows what I’ll get.
ADE: I’m too young to have herpes
LIZ: So what was that call about? When you were sobbing at 3 am in your boxers telling me your doctor confirmed you had syphilis?
ADE: Syphilis is not herpes.
ADE: Stupet.
LIZ: Same banana. you got it from a dick, same place where this girl got her STD.
ADE: Fuck you I told you never to tell anyone that.
LIZ: Well now that were having some closure with your audience, i in fact know who took this photo.
LIZ: You, fucker.

LIZ: I see tit.
ADE: I see a monster
LIZ: I never thought tits cans be so emo.
ADE: I never thought I’d see the day when tits can become an erection killer
LIZ: My dog’s tits look much more enchanting.
ADE: Hell, MY tits look more enchanting
LIZ: Really? Can you show them in the same pose? You know, so we can compare and shit!
ADE: I have a picture here somewhere. Wanna see? No? Fuck.
LIZ: WANNA SEE WANNA SEE!
LIZ: Unless its the one where you were with that other man behind you, naked. no. Not that one.
ADE: Then you saw it already.
LIZ: Then you need a new one. Can I take the pics?
LIZ: I’ll never let you live it down, friend.
ADE: Suicide break. brb

LIZ: OH FUCKER
LIZ: GOATSED
ADE: What the fuck is that… girl… chinese poodle doing?
LIZ: I remember you showing this to me while i was at work. Made me badly want to skin your hairy ass, with lemon juice to prevent infection.
LIZ: I say poodle.
ADE I say this is something you can look at and never go away scarred
ADE: Also, I think I found this thing under my sink last week
ADE: Was too scared to get rid of it
LIZ: I am duly scarred. can we get this over with so i can proceed to murder you?
LIZ: What the light from the camera flash didnt kill it?
ADE: Unfortunately, no.
ADE: But as you can see, the flash left a scar on its right shoulder
LIZ: Maybe it’s the hickey you gave it. I rather think it is, if you look closely.
ADE: Liz, dear, I would never even touch that thing with my dick, much less my lips.
LIZ: O RLY? Because I know for  fact that all these horrible pics youve been trying to ruin my dinner with for the past hour or so are taken by you.
LIZ: In exchange for some steamy secks
ADE: Walang laglagan
ADE: Ganyan na pala eh
LIZ: Bakit ba ako ang pinili mo maging guinea pig!
LIZ: Putang ina mo, ang sakit na ng mata ko seryoso

Ok, now that you’ve been put through the torture of those horrendous pictures, I suggest that you stare at this so that you’d be able to live another day.

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44 Responses to “Know Your Jologs: People Who Should Be Taken Out Of Their Misery”

  1. Roanne 06. May, 2007 at 11:24 pm #

    I like girl 4’s tits. :)

    I have the sudden urge to take down my primary pic in Friendster :/

    [Reply]

  2. Harry 07. May, 2007 at 2:35 am #

    Scarred… I’m considering not taking off my contact lenses tonight and maybe wake up blind… and I fell for that last link…

    [Reply]

  3. jhay 07. May, 2007 at 6:25 am #

    Why did I had to read this post? Now I have to go see my counselor again…LOL

    [Reply]

  4. Ingrid 07. May, 2007 at 6:33 am #

    Oh gawd. Not the last photo. That was totally horrendous.

    [Reply]

  5. Noelle 07. May, 2007 at 9:26 am #

    Goddammit!!!! >_

    [Reply]

  6. dimaks 08. May, 2007 at 1:19 am #

    i guess girl #1 did not have her dinner or maybe she’s in carnival show?

    [Reply]

  7. Bob 08. May, 2007 at 9:08 am #

    hahaha! that was awesome!
    anyways, thanks bro for the bday greeting!

    [Reply]

  8. Tina 08. May, 2007 at 9:16 am #

    Where do you find these things? Friendster? Hahahahahaha. I don’t know if I should laugh or be scared at # 3 and # 5 (though I’m leaning towards the latter for #5).

    [Reply]

  9. Richmond 08. May, 2007 at 1:58 pm #

    You did it again. And this is the best so far.

    I think the last girl is a Maxi Peel model.

    (Di ko mapigil ang tawa ko pucha)

    [Reply]

  10. Richmond 08. May, 2007 at 2:03 pm #

    The “this” link reminds me of the little patient’s puke last thursday. It was bloody, black puke. and the force of throwing up is the same as when you shoot water from a watergun.

    [Reply]

  11. paolomendoza 08. May, 2007 at 6:34 pm #

    the last one reminds me of Little Bo Peep’s evil twin. The one that never made it to the nursery rhyme.

    [Reply]

  12. Jhed 08. May, 2007 at 6:53 pm #

    Disturbing.

    [Reply]

  13. what the fuck 08. May, 2007 at 11:22 pm #

    thank god for slow intarnats, the link wasn’t able to load. i got to read the other victims posts.

    thank you for your sacrifice.

    god, the last girl is freaky.

    [Reply]

  14. arvin 08. May, 2007 at 11:33 pm #

    nde cla mukhang mga babae!! haha :P

    [Reply]

  15. Fly 09. May, 2007 at 12:01 am #

    sooooo haawttttt LOL

    [Reply]

  16. Euri 09. May, 2007 at 8:55 am #

    O_O

    That’s all.

    [Reply]

  17. greenpinoy 09. May, 2007 at 10:21 am #

    girl in yellow’s scary. big time.

    [Reply]

  18. Zherwin 09. May, 2007 at 4:01 pm #

    anak ng…

    [Reply]

  19. billycoy 10. May, 2007 at 5:23 pm #

    oh darn!!! this is a curse!!!

    if all girls are like that, i can die now!!!

    [Reply]

  20. keysi 11. May, 2007 at 1:06 am #

    oh fuck. lol

    [Reply]

  21. Jayvee 11. May, 2007 at 9:02 pm #

    Ade, where did you get these pics? You’re the master of catching these kinds of pictures.

    [Reply]

  22. Ade 12. May, 2007 at 4:33 am #

    [quote comment="38339"]thank god for slow intarnats, the link wasn’t able to load. i got to read the other victims posts.

    thank you for your sacrifice.

    god, the last girl is freaky.[/quote]

    Finally somebody noticed that my eyes are bleeding like mad!!11

    [quote comment="39166"]Ade, where did you get these pics? You’re the master of catching these kinds of pictures.[/quote]

    Dude, you have to surf teh innarnets. Look and be rewarded.

    [quote comment="38847"]oh darn!!! this is a curse!!!

    if all girls are like that, i can die now!!![/quote]

    Thankfully they’re not. But the good ones are taken though. BY ME!

    [Reply]

  23. xtina 13. May, 2007 at 3:41 pm #

    and i suddenly don’t wanna see tits for 24 hours.

    [Reply]

  24. Najo 14. May, 2007 at 9:49 pm #

    Ade, the last link, it was disgusting. Shit. I’m getting goosebumps. I want to kill myself. Shit. Give me valium!!!

    Really.
    Shit.

    [Reply]

  25. Ade 15. May, 2007 at 7:06 am #

    [quote comment="39764"]Ade, the last link, it was disgusting. Shit. I’m getting goosebumps. I want to kill myself. Shit. Give me valium!!!

    Really.
    Shit.[/quote]

    My dear Najo, I think you have just been GOATSED!

    [Reply]

  26. Neil 15. May, 2007 at 11:43 am #

    OMG. I thought dogs are cute. Ugh. I can’t take this anymore. I hate dogs! I hate dogs!

    Oh… uh, I think I made a mistake. Is this Alpo? What are these dog pics doing in here? Oh! It’s ade! Nice dog show.

    Lol.

    ————-
    (*pukes very very baahd)

    Yuck. Ang Sarap.

    (*seizures)

    [Reply]

  27. MITCH 16. May, 2007 at 8:06 pm #

    Hahaha. You guys are mean. And funny! I can’t believe i clicked the link at the bottom. Oww. My eyes!

    [Reply]

  28. Alex 17. May, 2007 at 6:29 am #

    Oh man… Wrong! Just plain wrong.

    [Reply]

  29. Mark 22. May, 2007 at 7:53 pm #

    Good grief! God is good. He allows those people to exist so that we can feel better about ourselves! Lol!

    [Reply]

  30. Elizel 23. May, 2007 at 12:40 am #

    Thank you for the lulz. Ever victimized anyone with Hai2u? 8D

    [Reply]

  31. jason 29. Oct, 2007 at 4:55 pm #

    this is tasteless and sick! don’t you have nothing better to do than make fun of these people just to get traffic?! these are real people. i did not find this funny at all… get a brain, dude! you’re shallow and inconsiderate. i am real sorry i clicked on your blog. i will now block this site from my browser. you’re more shameless than they are for posting this kind of blog.

    [Reply]

  32. Ade 29. Oct, 2007 at 5:08 pm #

    [quote comment="83301"]this is tasteless and sick! don’t you have nothing better to do than make fun of these people just to get traffic?! these are real people. i did not find this funny at all… get a brain, dude! you’re shallow and inconsiderate. i am real sorry i clicked on your blog. i will now block this site from my browser. you’re more shameless than they are for posting this kind of blog.[/quote]

    LOL

    [Reply]

  33. keysi 29. Oct, 2007 at 5:18 pm #

    BWAHAHAHA! I tell you, we should find a store that sells brains. Decency too. LOL

    [Reply]

  34. mill 28. Aug, 2008 at 3:51 am #

    damn!- wish i have amnesia after reading this.

    [Reply]

  35. mandz 06. Sep, 2009 at 9:43 am #

    uh oh.. i do have a pic Like the first girl but im not that girl, (a confession. haha) it did happen when we were having a company outing and my boss asked me to take a pic while my fist is inside my mouth. haha. it was one of my talent that i discovered when i was young. though i cant remember how it happened..

    anyhow..

    i guess we just have a different trips and whatever. hehehe. so the first pic for me is just like okay.. maybe it was just for fun, but the other pictures ??…hhmmm.. i don’t know looks like they are selling their bodies.. hehe

    [Reply]

  36. mandz 06. Sep, 2009 at 9:50 am #

    *i can’t deLete my previous comment so i’LL just submit a new one haha*

    uh oh.. i do have a pic Like the first girl but im not that girl, (a confession. haha) it did happen when we were having a company outing and my boss asked me to take a pic while my fist is inside my mouth. haha. it was one of my talents (as if i have a Lot of taLents?!? haha) that i discovered when i was young. though i cant remember how it happened..

    anyhow..

    so that was it, my boss took a picture me having that kind of pose.. i guess we just have a different trips and whatever. hehehe. so the first pic for me is like.. okay.. maybe it was just for fun, but the other pictures ??…hhmmm.. i don’t know looks like they are selling their bodies.. hehe

    [Reply]

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